Yesterday morning we dropped off the kiddos at school and were on the road headed to UCLA (Santa Monica Facility) by 8am for several appointments. Because the trip is so far and takes so long, I try to schedule everything on the same day. It makes for a very long day, but at least I'm not taking multiple trips out there each month. With my CT appointment scheduled for 10:20am and my other appointments later in the afternoon, we figured we'd make with no problem. Yeah...wrong. By 10am GPS put us nearly an hour away. I was starting to panic. This long awaited scan was to be the first since starting my new treatment and would be the first peek at whether or not it's working on holding off my cancer. If I missed the appointment it meant I'd have to reschedule for another day, take another day off work, and fight the LA traffic to get there. I called radiology and explained the situation. The receptionist was so nice! She put me on hold and contacted the radiologist who said not to worry. He switched around his lunch and pushed my appointment. AMAZING. I feel so blessed to be at UCLA for treatment. The compassion and care I have been treated with from every department and every person is extraordinary. 
When I arrived for the scan, the tech immediately came out to greet me. He handed my a bottle of a liquid I had to drink within an hour to coat my intestine before the scan. One hour late he returned to take me and Brandon to the back to prepare for my scan. I explained to him I can only use one arm for my IV since I had lymph nodes removed when I had my mastectomy. Because of all the chemo I have had, my veins are weak. During my last few rounds of chemo, things got so bad with finding a vein that I had to be stuck multiple times by multiple nurses. Yesterday proved to be no different. The CT scan itself (chest, abdomen, and pelvis) literally takes less than 15 minutes, but I was in that room prepping for nearly 2 hours. The first nurse stuck me twice digging around for a vein. When she couldn't get it, she called in for reinforcements. The second nurse stuck me twice digging around for a vein. When she couldn't get it she called for a specialist. Those poor nurses! They felt so bad and kept apologizing. I kept telling them not to worry, I've been through much worse. It's really not their fault my veins suck...it's cancer's fault!!! When the specialist arrived she stuck me twice digging around for a vein and once again was unsuccessful. Things got serious at this point. She straight put on her game face and told me to brace myself. She meant business. She pulled my arm straight, prepped the nook, and told me to take a deep breath. And with that she went deep. Super deep. She plowed through scar tissue and nailed a juicy vein. It was the most painful IV I have ever had. Ever. I burst into tears. Not because I couldn't handle the pain, but because I had just been poked seven times. SEVEN. And I was just done and exhausted. I cried because this freaking suuuuuuucks. But I'm a badass and my self-pity lasted about 30 seconds before I sucked it up and womanned-up. The staff was so wonderful and comforting. Every visit to UCLA, no matter what department, is an affirmation I made the right choice to switch my care. After my CT, I met with Dr. Callahan. Amazingly when I met with her the results for the CT of my abdomen and pelvis were already ready and in the computer.
drumroll, please.........
No new cancer activity!!! Cancer is stable! Thank you Jesus! Can I get an AMEN!
Dr. Callahan explained that the results for the CT of the chest usually takes the longest. Today the results came in.
Another drumroll, please.........
No new cancer activity! Cancer is stable! Shout out to the Big Man upstairs!
The best part of the new treatment, aside from the fact that it seems to be working, is there are minimal side effects. The worst being hot flashes (they're the devil!) and fatigue (generally at the end of my day). They suck, but they're manageable. Nothing impeding my quality of life or my daily activities. We are still waiting for the results of my tumor marker, which hopefully has dropped since my last one. Before I left Dr. Callahan's office, I had a blood draw done and got four shots of my cancer fighting cocktails. 12 pokes total in one day. That's a new record. One I hope NEVER to beat. 
Aside from this stupid cancer, life is good. If it weren't for the cancer I'd say it was damn near perfect. I'm living life and enjoying every minute of it. I keep a smile on my face and positivity in my heart. Don't get me wrong, there is panic and fear simmering under all my emotions. That is unavoidable. It's my new normal. But I refuse to let it boil over or rule my life. There will be a time (hopefully a very long time from now) where I will let the pain and fear and panic wash over me. That time is not now. I'm good now. I feel good and life is good. Why waste my time on allowing this disease to take away my joy? Ain't nobody got time for that! I have too much to live for and so much left to do with my life. In the midst of all this, I have my babies to think about. And while I'm grateful that Leo is too young to really understand what is going on, Ava understands it all. She understands it in a way that makes me both proud and sad. They hear what we say, our little ones. They soak it in. It's amazing what little minds can comprehend. But alas, that story is for another day and another post. 